One of the reasons I blog is to learn. The act of blogging about X, the process of thinking through X and then typing X down, has the effect of making X stay in the mind a bit longer. Gives the brain more time to form those connections that make things easier to remember, I think.
So, here goes an attempt to learn. For as long as I can remember, I’ve had problems taking compliments graciously and appreciatively. Here’s a recent example: Someone told me, “Y spoke very highly of you”. I went, “Oh, is that right?”. Every “Good job!”, say, would meet with a “You really think so?”-type response. And usually, something dark would flash across the complimenter’s face, and I’d see my reaction wasn’t what they expected, and certainly wasn’t what something enjoyable.
- Be honest and optimistic about the future. Not pointing out your weaknesses doesn’t mean you can’t be honest about what lays ahead. But a simple “We still have to do x, y, and z but it’s good to see we’re on the right track” will suffice. Don’t make someone waste their effort paying a compliment by telling them how the thing they’re praising is probably doomed to fail in the long run.
- Recognize your contribution. You may not be the only one who deserves to be complimented on a job well-done, and it’s fine to say so, but remember that you’re a part of your group’s success, too. Don’t say “Well, Hassan and LaShawna deserve all the credit”; instead say “Thanks, I’m sure Hassan and LaShawna will appreciate hearing that, too.”
Hope these stay in my very porous brain long enough for me to get out of the habit of questioning folks who compliment me.